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‘I don’t believe that man,’ she said bitterly, ‘he says he has to go to Cleveland again tonight. And he’ll be gone for at least a week. Dammit, what’s the matter with him, anyhow?’ Tommy listened. He didn’t understand why his aunt stayed married to the man. Finally, a look of determination formed on her face. ‘I don’t need him,’ she said, ‘I’ve taken all I’m going to from him. When he comes home to get his clothes, I’m telling him he has to make a choice. Either he gets a transfer so he can be home more and goes to marriage counseling with me, or I’m going to see about getting a divorce!’ Tommy hadn’t expected this. ‘Aunt Karen, are…are you sure?’ he asked. His aunt looked at him, resolve in her eyes, and nodded slowly. ‘Why not?’ she said. ‘He’s a boor when he’s home, which isn’t that often, and he treats me like some kind of servant.’ ‘What are you going to do about money?’ Tommy asked. ‘By the time I’m done with that asshole in divorce court, I’ll own him,’ she said. ‘Besides,. “Please don’t let this become about name-calling! Be reasonable, please. Or at least polite.”“Hang on a sec, you voluntarily fucked and sucked and did god knows what else with that slimy fat fuck for hours on end so he wouldn’t block your promotion, which would have given you a pay raise. Which means you fucked him for a paycheque - money. That’s the very definition of whore in any dictionary you care to name. In fact, your picture may be in some of them under that entry. And I should be reasonable?”Her mouth opened and closed. I don’t think she had ever suspected this side of me. The Lord of Fucking Smash Mouth.Of course, it helped that I’d had a couple of hours to stew about it and think of a few choice phrases, while she was freshly into this conversation as soon as she let herself in the front door, with “all the shopping” she had supposedly been doing during the afternoon. Her secretary had obviously told her about my earlier phone call, when she’d informed me that my wife.
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